Relationships? Hm....
I meant to post about this like right after I had the conversation, but.... well I'm me and so I just put it off and seeing as it's 3 in the morning I thought: "Hey! Why not write a blog post now?" and so here we are.
Anyway, I had a neat conversation, last tuesday, about boyfriend/girlfriend relationships and I realy want to use this post sort of as a refinement of how I feel about dating, for now anyway.
How I haven't read any books about this and I haven't really talked to anyone about this a whole lot but I think that a "boyfriend/girdfriend" relationship isn't so much "dating" as much as just being friends. Obviously there's more ot it than that but if you focus too much on what the media is feeding us, that we have to look a certain way to be cool or do certain things to be liked (relevent link), then you lose sight of what you should really be aiming for: just loving each other.
Have you ever noticed how almost every single one of the couples still married after 60+ (or how ever long) years always seem to be friends with each other? They're certainly not sticking together because the other is "hot".
Now certainly high-school relationships can be a good thing. They offer a semi-casual place to make mistakes and have fun, they also act as stepping stones into deeper relationships, but all the same, the focus needs to not be on what the media tells us and more on just being friends, since it seems that's one of the skills most of us need the most practice with.
The thing is most of us think we're much more mature than we really are and that tends to lead to broken friendships, which is never good.
I think that most people need to realize that a relationship built on things like looks and sex and peer-pressure is like builting a sand castle, it won't take much (say a stick of dynamite) to ruin.
Now, I totally understand things seem a lot different when you've got a crush on a cute guy/girl or your friends are like "Dude, you went to a moive with her, why havn't you asked her out yet?" but this is just something to keep in mind.
One way to keep friends from pressuing you about a relationship is "group dating". Go out with big groups of people (eg. youth group) that way even if you do sit by someone you like it's less likely someone will think of it as a "date".
I know there was at least one other thing but being 4:30 am my memory isn't quite the best. So.... yeah! That's sorta my outlook on boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. In short, being friends is the best way to go.
I get the strange feeling, like I do with most of my posts, that this post is incomplete and that I left something out. If it seems incomplete to you, lemme know, I suck at critiquing my own work. Thanks ^_^
Anyway! Voi!
Anyway, I had a neat conversation, last tuesday, about boyfriend/girlfriend relationships and I realy want to use this post sort of as a refinement of how I feel about dating, for now anyway.
How I haven't read any books about this and I haven't really talked to anyone about this a whole lot but I think that a "boyfriend/girdfriend" relationship isn't so much "dating" as much as just being friends. Obviously there's more ot it than that but if you focus too much on what the media is feeding us, that we have to look a certain way to be cool or do certain things to be liked (relevent link), then you lose sight of what you should really be aiming for: just loving each other.
Have you ever noticed how almost every single one of the couples still married after 60+ (or how ever long) years always seem to be friends with each other? They're certainly not sticking together because the other is "hot".
Now certainly high-school relationships can be a good thing. They offer a semi-casual place to make mistakes and have fun, they also act as stepping stones into deeper relationships, but all the same, the focus needs to not be on what the media tells us and more on just being friends, since it seems that's one of the skills most of us need the most practice with.
The thing is most of us think we're much more mature than we really are and that tends to lead to broken friendships, which is never good.
I think that most people need to realize that a relationship built on things like looks and sex and peer-pressure is like builting a sand castle, it won't take much (say a stick of dynamite) to ruin.
"Falling in love at first sight is as final as it is swift....
but the groth of true friendship may be a life long affair."
- Sarah Orne Jewett
Now, I totally understand things seem a lot different when you've got a crush on a cute guy/girl or your friends are like "Dude, you went to a moive with her, why havn't you asked her out yet?" but this is just something to keep in mind.
One way to keep friends from pressuing you about a relationship is "group dating". Go out with big groups of people (eg. youth group) that way even if you do sit by someone you like it's less likely someone will think of it as a "date".
I know there was at least one other thing but being 4:30 am my memory isn't quite the best. So.... yeah! That's sorta my outlook on boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. In short, being friends is the best way to go.
I get the strange feeling, like I do with most of my posts, that this post is incomplete and that I left something out. If it seems incomplete to you, lemme know, I suck at critiquing my own work. Thanks ^_^
Anyway! Voi!
posted by Hawk-McKain | 6/19/2006 03:00:00 AM
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